Jordie's shaking his head. "No, look -- you can be a jerk. Everybody can be a jerk. When you apologize, though, especially with someone you don't know well, you get so ritualized about it that it's either coming across as wholly insincere or the bad kind of precious, neither of which is all that attractive. And the reason you get ritualized is becaue you overthink it. Whether you realize it or not. Because manners like that are just a way to overthink things."